I began writing journal entries to my dad when I was 25. It started with me forgiving him for not being there my entire life, and I still carry this tradition throughout my life…
my open journal entry: #quarantine2020
Dear Dad,
We’re all speeding going the wrong way down a one way. It feels like we’ve all lost the wheel and are locked in a tailspin. What do I do when my grief has my happiness in a chokehold?
Do I deflect, reflect — address to redress? Get it? Are people even getting dressed anymore in quarantine?
No, I write, I write to feel and be — be in a place of full expression. To feel safe and guarded – to feel stronger.
Strength has been tough to find in all this. It’s a privilege to have moments of strength moved into me through production sets. I can still feel the gravity being snatched from the room when Hector shared stories about his father. He had a deep sadness, he wasn’t afraid to show. Every word he spoke had honor and sincere love. He lost both his parents before becoming a teenager; and he has this beaming pride when speaking of the deep love for the arts, he and his father share.
This fuels me.
You’d be proud to know humans believed in a vision from my little head to produce this content. I wish that for you – pride. Thank you for having an open mind and space for these sentences, these feelings. They give me strength and a sense of pride.
A NAIVE PRIVILEGE
(FREEDOM)
Erika, from the Foot Locker shoot said, “I would like the next generation up to move with a sense of – privilege. Like my peers that don’t look like us – privileged.”
Imagine that, making decisions rooted in your whole identity. How could I be bold and self-expressed without knowing who I am fully though? I guess that’s just the fatherless’ fate? And, So I write, I write words to stand with you:
“Be gentle on yourself. Remind yourself nothing defines you but you. Your strength shows up wherever you are.”
– Nate
